Surgery Center Homecoming Queen 2009

I just have to say that our appointment today with the surgeon was top notch, and more encouraging that I think I am able to express.

When J called to make the appointment, the receptionist was very surprised to hear that I've been nursing exclusively. By the time we got there, the staff was a twitter about it. The receptionist said, "so you're the one who's nursing?" as she handed me the paperwork.

As we met with the doctor, he was extremely patient with our questions and very informative about what we can expect with Sadie's surgeries for the short term and the long term. Our first surgery date is tentatively scheduled for February 10, 2010. On the one hand it seems forever away, but on the other hand, I can't believe I will take my baby in for surgery in 9 short weeks.

The doctor was quick to remind us that this first surgery will be worse for us than it will be for Sadie. It's a brief surgery [just about an hour] and she will only need to spend one night in the hospital. It's not something she will even remember!

As we finished the consultation, the doctor commented again that he was encouraged by the fact that we could nurse. In 15 years, he said he's never seen a baby with a cleft lip and palette who was able to breastfeed.

I don't even know if I can describe how I felt in that moment. I am so overwhelmed by God's goodness to us in this area. After that first incident with Sadie's breathing, I asked specifically for family and friends to be praying about her feedings. That was our request whenever anyone asked how they could be praying, and look at what the Lord has done! It's truly miraculous.

As we checked out of the office and scheduled our surgery and pre-op visits, the various staff members began slowly coming over to where we were. They were all amazed at how well she is doing with the nursing, and they gushed over her hair. I joked that it was like she was the homecoming queen!

It's not going to be a short road, and it looks like we're dealing with a minimum of 3 surgeries but realistically more like 5.

If you're interested in specific ways you can pray, here are a few requests:

• We speak with the pediatric surgeon later this week about the cyst in Sadie's lung. Please pray that she would feel that it's unecessary to do a surgery to remove it.
• Please pray that Sadie would be gaining weight adequately. We go to the pediatrician tomorrow for a weight check. So many things seem to be on target with her nursing [her satisfaction between feedings, sleeping habits, and her output], but if she's not gaining, I'm not sure what that could mean in terms of the breastfeeding.
• For the long term, we are praying that only three surgeries would be required. There are occasionally follow up surgeries or "revisions" that have to happen and we are hopeful that she will not need anything other than the major corrective surgeries.

Thank you so much for your continued prayers and encouragement. They have blessed us more than you know!

Brusha, Brusha, Brusha

Just a little taste of our bed time routine!

And so it begins...

Being the Monday after a holiday weekend, we had quite a bit to do this morning. Thankfully J has today off, so we've been able to take care of a few things for little Miss Sadie.

It was definitely a little shocking when J announced that he got our appointment with the cleft palette surgeon scheduled for TODAY at 2:30 PM.

Okay, umm, yeah, today, really?

I'd been praying that it would be soon, but I'm just not sure I was prepared for it to be that soon. It should be good to get some more information and hopefully be able to go ahead and schedule the first [of what is now feeling like an overwhelming number] of surgeries for her.

I will try to post more later when we have more information.

In the meantime, check out the sweetness!

when Marmee came to town

I am shamelessly stealing the title for this blog post from my sister, but it was a better title than I think I could come up with right now. So we're just going to roll with it!

Yesterday we had to say goodbye to J's mom [Marmee] who was here for all of Thanksgiving week. What a huge blessing it was to have her here! We had last weekend to shop and hang out and enjoy a little down time. Then, Monday night, we were able to leave for the hospital knowing that the kids were in the best of care. That was a huge stress relief to say the least!

Marmee spent the week entertaining kids, managing household duties for me and J, fielding a hysterical phone call from me at the hospital, helping haul children back and forth from the hospital for naps and meals, cuddling Sadie, and listening to me and encouraging me. J's mom is a certified speech pathologist who has lots of experience working with children who have speech issues and quite a bit of experience with cleft palettes as well. She was able to offer some great information and encourage us in some incredible ways because of her knowledge about the situation.

I really am thankful that she was willing to give up a week of time her time during the Thanksgiving holiday [and her anniversary] to care for us the way she did. It's a sacrifice I will not soon forget!

We managed to get all the kids in one shot! This was taken just before bedtime on Monday night. I was having contractions at that point, but I hadn't told anyone because I wasn't sure if it was the "real" deal.

Meeting Sadie at the hospital.

Welcome home Sadie!

We got this shot shortly before she headed out to the airport. I just keep looking at it and thinking, "wow, I really have four children!" Kind of crazy when you see them all together like that.



Thanks again Marmee for your time and all your help. It was quite a week you walked with us, and we are sooooo thankful!

We know she's a fighter!

I realize that the blog posts about sweet baby Sadie have been short and somewhat cryptic to this point. I blame it on the fact that I'm just having a hard time articulating the events of the past four days.

Four days? Really? In some ways I feel like I've lived a lifetime in those four short days.

I'm going to do my best to give an update here. Words are elusive, and I seem to be heavy on exhaustion these days! Hopefully this will give you a little more information about what's been going on and give you some ideas of how you can continue to pray for our family. We would covet your prayers!

I am thankful for the events of our "fun" ultrasound that began preparing me for a different reality. I mean, adding a fourth child to our family is certainly a new reality, but preparing myself for a different situation was truly God's great blessing in this situation.

When Sadie shot out [literally!], I was absolutely overwhelmed to hear that first precious cry and to see her sweet pink skin. We were also surprised in that moment to see that Sadie had a cleft lip and palette, a condition that was missed on all three of our ultrasounds. When I was able to nurse her a few minutes later, I was completely overhwelmed with thankfulness. It was a moment I did not know if I would have with her, and it was oh, so sweet. The condition with her lip and palette was unexpected, but to have such a precious baby who seemed otherwise healthy was a gift. I could not help but rejoice in that moment!

As the day dawned, we began to try and assess exactly what was going on. To have a cyst on her lungs in addition to the cleft lip and palette meant that there could quite possibly be other issues.

The pediatrician ordered an x-ray to check out the cyst and a heart ultrasound to see if Sadie's lip and palette were possibly an indication of other midline defects.

It was emotional, overwhelming, and definitely a little scary. This pink bundle of heaven could have some major problems and a hard road ahead of her; that is never news a momma wants to hear.

As we were processing this new reality, we were also encouraged by so many things. Nursing can be a real issue with a cleft lip and palette, and little Sadie was a champ! Such a blessing.

Mid morning on Sadie's birthday, J came home to get the kids and bring them to the hospital to meet Sadie. I was alone with Sadie soaking up every second. In an extremely frightning moment, I suddenly found myself with a newborn baby struggling to breathe. I watched in sheer terror and horror as she gasped for air and began to turn blue. I will never forget the look in her eyes as she struggled and fought. It was slow motion as they whisked her out of my arms to make sure all was okay.

It's hard to even write about because it was such an overwhelming moment. It was all I could to to sob and beg Jesus for my sweet baby girl. I think that was the moment that I began to understand the magnitude of the situation. This is a new normal. A lifetime of a new reality.

There have been other times that we have watched her struggle to catch her breath, but nothing nearly as serious as that first experience.

We would later learn that they cyst is still present on her lung and will likely require surgery relatively soon.

There will be a surgery for her lip and palette about the time she is ten weeks old. This is the first in a series of surgeries to correct the cleft.

There are also two minor issues with her heart. The doctor's think they are relatively normal connections that are not complete and should heal without intervention, but we will likely have follow up just to make sure.

In addition, there could be other problems that present as she grows and develops, but I'm resolved at this point that we will take those one at a time.

There are a million more things that I want to say, and hopefully I will find the time to do that soon. For the time being, here are a few pictures of our sweet Sadie Bess.

She definitely has a full head of hair!

Ella cannot get enough of her baby sister.

Coming home...she wasn't really feeling the car seat!

Ella was so excited to have her home that she was quick to share her blanket head. If you knew how much she loves that blanket head, you would know it's true love!


Please continue to pray for Sadie and our family as we process all these changes.

Thankful

She's here!

Sadie Bess arrived at 1:40 AM this morning, weighing a healthy 6 pounds, 8 ounces, and measuring 20 and a quarter inches.

She is a little thing, but she sure has a full head of dark hair, seriously thick dark hair!

I'm exhausted right now and totally emotional for lots of reasons, but I'm just going to keep it brief and say that we would really covet your prayers. I will try to post again when I have the chance and some more news, but it looks like our journey with sweet Sadie is going to be different than our previous experiences. Pray for wisdom for us and for the doctors as we deal with specialists in these next hours, weeks, and months.

Thank you sweet Jesus for this beautiful girl and how you've brought her to our family!

Baby Time

We are at the hospital now. We're hanging out between 8 and 9 cm, and we are excited to meet our little girl. Just taking bets at this point on whether her birthday will be the 23rd or 24th. More to come...

A few perks

One of the few perks of finding out about the cyst in this little one's lung and having some extra appointments is that we got some extra peeks at the baby. Here are a few things we know that we probably wouldn't have otherwise...

She definitely has some hair. The ultrasound tech said that the hair was thick enough the vernix made it visible on the back of her head. Not sure if she'll have any on the TOP of her head, but there should be some on the back.

She's measuring a tad on the small side. She's well within a normal range, but they are thinking she's going to be in the 6-7 pound range rather than the 8-9 pound range. Considering Bo came at 38 weeks in an 8 lb., 6 oz. body and with a 95th percentile head, I like hearing she's not going to be huge!

The girl has some long legs. Her legs were measuring almost two weeks ahead of the rest of her body parts. Can't be bad for a girl to have nice long legs, right?

She has a NAME! When we found out about the cyst, I told J that I thought it was really important she have a name. I'm not one who thinks knowing the sex or having a name increases the bond in any way, but I really wanted to be able to pray for her by name as we journeyed through the end of our pregnancy. It's been a little strange to feel like I know who she is before she's even here. Definitely a new experience considering we didn't even know the sex the last three times, much less the name.

Our families do know her name, but we're going to wait until she gets here to post anything here.

I'm off to the doctor in a few...maybe we'll have an update later!

Best game ever...

Jack's favorite new kitchen activity is hiding in the pantry. Ella often joins him for a rousing good time.

The only loser in this scenario is the sandwich bread, which often gets a massage from one or both of the kids during the game. Smushed bread tastes the same, so I guess I can't complain.

Bye-Bye mommy!

Hey, here we are.

We are sooo funny.

Cheese!

Big News

No baby.

BUT we did have a milestone moment this morning.

Jack pooped in the potty!!

He's been the easiest to read so far in terms of his potty "signals" so knowing when he has to go has not been super difficult.

We had a little celebration afterwards and he was so excited, although not completely understanding of it all.

Considering he filled his diaper about ten minutes later I'm not sure we've cracked the code, but this definitely falls into the "victory" category!

Craving Fried Turkey

My sister and her husband have a fabulous early Thanksgiving tradition they call Bruner Thanksgiving. I got to go last year and hang out and enjoy the chaos of it all and it was a blast!

This year, my parents and my two younger sisters are there to celebrate and enjoy some seriously amazing fried turkey. AND the capper of the weekend is the baptism of my niece and nephew tomorrow morning. To say that I ache to be there is an understatement. It's probably a good thing that I'm as pregnant as I am or I might have had all the kids in the car for a serious road trip.

Still hanging out here. Still pregnant. Still feeling good. Today is the first day in a while that I haven't had a single contraction. I kind of miss it. How crazy is that? You know you do kind of get to a point later in pregnancy where those early contractions are actually exciting and even feel good. Good in a "labor is coming" sort of way!

We're headed out to a fundraiser for the youth group at our church in a little bit. It's a night of line dancing and steak eating and karaoke fun. I'm thinking maybe this little girl will get super jazzed up by the electric slide and decide she wants to join us! We'll see, I guess.

Truth: I still expect to be pregnant this time tomorrow, but at least I'll have the steak and the electric slide tonight :)

En Route

I am not in labor and en route to the hospital!

I just thought it necessary to lead with that. I'm definitely at the point in my pregnancy that when I call people I can tell they are waiting a few moments to exhale and find out if this is "the call." No baby yet. No real signs of labor yet. Just a few random contractions here and there.

J's mom is actually en route today, and we are so excited. We spent the morning making brownies to go with dinner, decorating signs for her arrival, and doing a few last minute chores. J will pick her up on his way home from work and we are definitely ready to have us some company!

I think I'm pretty much ready for this baby as well. We've had several "pajama party" days...

Exhibit A

Exhibit B

and a few crazy hair days...

Exhibit C


BUT the little girl's clothes are washed, beds are ready, bathrooms are sparkling, meals are frozen, and life is in "coast" mode until she does arrive.

I still don't think it will be any second, and selfishly, I hope that I get to enjoy dinner tonight because it smells so delicious right now! Oh, and it would be fun to have a really low key weekend with J's mom as well. So maybe Monday would be perfect! Or maybe just whenever; we all know that I can't really control it anyways :)

Feelin' the chill

It's finally starting to cool off here. I knew it couldn't be 75 degrees all winter, although that could be nice!

The kids busted out their snuggly animal blankets the other day and had all kinds of fun.

Bo and the frog blanket:

Ella, the monkey:

And Jack didn't have a blanket, but we still got a picture.

And here's the winner of Best Attempt at a Group Shot



Hmmm...my photography skills need some serious work!

How are you?

The lack of recent blog posts is directly related to the manic nesting that is currently happening around here.

I think J said it best Saturday night as he commented on the fact that Thursday evening he walked in from work to find dozens of loaves of pumpkin bread all over the counter and cream cheese icing containers stacked in the kitchen. Friday afternoon when he got home from work they were gone, every single one of them. It wasn't until Saturday when I pulled one [of the two that were left] out of the freezer that he asked about them. There was a simple explanation: I'd made them for my MOPS meeting on Friday morning and distributed them to the discussion leaders that I lead. He just laughed and said that at this phase of pregnancy he never really knows what he'll find!

So true!

I've been busy, but Jack's early birth [three weeks before his due date] really surprised me! In an attempt to be prepared a little earlier this time, I've been working pretty hard. At this point, her bed is ready, clothes are washed, the freezer is stocked with food, and a few things are ready to go to the hospital. I'm avoiding packing a bag because if the bag's not packed then she can't come, right? I would still like a little more time!

It seems like most people want to know how I'm doing/feeling. At least, that's always the first question they ask, so I just assume that's what they want to know :)

In truth, I feel really, really good. I certainly feel much better than I did at this point with Jack. There were days during that pregancy that it hurt to stand up for any length of time. My back was not really feeling it and the thought of bathing the kids without J's help made me want to cry!

This time around, I have really been surprised. I actually feel good enough that I would seriously consider doing this again :)

That said, I have had contractions, both Braxton Hicks and the real deal. This is the first time I've experienced either of those before actually being in labor. It's kind of strange, but it's certainly not anything consistent or long enough to even give me pause.

I wasn't surprised when the doctor said that I was at 3 cm at my last appointment. It's not unusual for me to dilate early. I can't say that I feel like labor is going to happen any time soon though. I realize you never know, but it just doesn't feel like it's going to be any minute.

I've got a few more things I'd like to do this week and then J's mom comes in Friday afternoon. After that, I say bring on the baby...I can't wait to meet her!

This is why I love fall!

Seriously, is there anything cuter than an 18 month old in a track suit?

Better late than never!

It's actually been several weeks since the kids had their trip to the dentist, but these photos are too cute not to put on here!

Bo went first, and he was a champ. He was a little disappointed that he had to wear the pink glasses, and he mentioned to the dentist several times that a blue Thomas pair would make a great replacement.

Jack and Ella watched Bo. Can you tell Ella was trying to figure out how it was going to go down for her?

She was waaaaay more excited than I thought she would be...

...until the exam started. Notice the clenched hands? She really did great, even though the toothpaste made her gag and Mr. Slurpy was a little scary. She held my hands most of the time and decided in the end that it was all worth it for her new pink and purple princess toothbrush :)



Jack got to observe this visit, and that was good enough for me! He actually ended up walking around outside for the last half of the visit with Aunt Maggie. It was too much to hold him and help Ella at the same time.

Dinosaur sized sigh of relief, almost

Yesterday, we had our last [or so we thought at the time] soccer game of the season.





We planned to do lunch after the game and have an awards ceremony for the kids so that we could give them their awards and medals. It's been the topic of many discussions this week.





Tuesday morning, Bo tearily asked, "Mom, why do we have to have our last soccer practice tonight? I don't want it to be the last one. Can you change it please?"





Ella's been very interested in the whole idea of the soccer party and has asked about it throughout the week. I realized her reasoning for the excitement when she informed me on Thursday morning that she would "probaby have chocolate ice cream at the soccer party, or maybe strawberry." I realized that in her mind party=birthday party=ice cream. I informed her that while there would most likely not be ice cream, I was planning to make cupcakes. That was sufficient enough to keep her interested in the idea :)





So we got up Saturday morning, donned our T-Rex COACH shirts and headed out to the fields. Who would have thought it would be 79 degrees for the last game?





Bo was ready for action!

I love this shot of him with J just before the game started.

It was an action packed game, and Bo has really embraced the experience. My favorite thing about watching him play is that he giggles with delight the entire time. As he's chasing the ball, I can hear him laughing!

Then, it was off to the party!

After a little lunch, we did a brief awards ceremony. Bo actually did a really good job throughout the season of throwing the ball in from the sidelines, so he got the Great Throw-In Award.

I couldn't get him to stop looking at the paper for long enough to show it to me. He was so proud. He was telling me all about it later and demonstrating his throw in skills for me throughout the afternoon.

It was in the midst of the awards that a parent asked if we had a make up game next weekend like all the other teams.

What? Huh?

Turns out we're not the most informed coaches, apparently. We assured the parents that we would find out if there was, in fact, a make up game and let them know.

Then, we all enjoyed the cupcakes I spent the morning icing and decorating. Because, of course, we had to have a T-Rex and some soccer balls.

They were definitely a hit!

Jack was pretty disappointed when his was all gone. Part of the problem is that he crams it in his mouth at such a rapid rate that a. half of it falls on the floor and b. the other kids are still taking the paper off when his is gone. He calmed down eventually!

We had a few kids stick around for long enough to get one last team shot. It's amazing to me how Bo can look so little and seem so big all at the same time!

Once we got home, I checked the calendar and confirmed that we do actually have another game next weekend. Who knew that cancellation for field conditions a couple of weeks ago would mean a make up game?

So, we're off to the fields again next weekend for an encore. Had I known that I would be 37 weeks prego and still coaching this team, I might have given pause in my initial commitment :)

Remembering the Moment

I got these shots the other night because I wanted to remember the moment as clearly as possible!

The way he was putting the hat on himself.

The excitement when he actually got it on.

The little bit of belly poking out of his pajamas.

The intermittent roars he would make because of the dinosaurs on his pajamas.

Too precious!


Oh, how I love an 18 month old!